The Modesty Panel: How Well-Fitting Bras Made Me Cover Up

Typical neckline and fit for what I used to wear
before finding out about correctly fitted bras.

For me modesty seem to essentially be about not drawing attention to yourself, something I've never been good at. Ever since I could even talk I've always stated my opinion and always questioned everything that seemed non-logical to me, no matter if it meant getting into an intellectual verbal fight with teachers or the nine-year-olds at school when I was 6. I was never aiming at getting attention, the attention I got was just a consequence of my lack of fear of questioning authorities and my inability of keeping my nose out when I felt someone was treated unfair. Modesty as a concept as always seemed very strange to me and I never really understood it, despite living in a country with a culture more or less based on the idea that you should not stand out. Why diminish yourself in order to be seek some sort of peer approval? To be open to the ideas of others, yes! Listen and respect each other, absolutely  Be open to new perspectives, definitely  But does that mean that we as a group need to make each and every one of us smaller as an individual in order to be able to do these really basic things? And if we demand that sort of modesty in order to respect another human being, do we even respect the person to start with?

A Tribute to My Mother

My body type isn’t especially alike my mum’s. Before she had me she had what now probably is best described as a “models figure”. Tall, straight and skinny with really long blonde, almost white, hair. 5 feet 10 and a 24-25 inch waist, and with a small A-cup at the most. She didn’t even used to wear bras back then. With high cheek bones and piercing blue eyes she was a real beauty.

I on the other hand as a lot shorter compared to her. Fourteen years old I filled a C-cup, but not until I was 17 my boobs I really started growing. A couple of years later I wear a GG(K) and still growing. I’m still fairly slim with a 26-inch waist, but with a large bust and quite some booty. No one on my mother’s side looks anything remotely similar to me, but about two years ago I found out that my grandmother on my father’s side had a breast reduction done way back.

After having me and my sister my mum got hips, something I still believe is hard for her to accept. Because of some (negative) medical reasons she is now more of a E-cup, and has gone from a straight slim figure to a true hourglass, which probably is even harder to accept. Her hair might not be so blonde anymore either, but the cheekbones are still there and I still find her very beautiful.

My mum didn’t really understand the whole idea of bras when I thought it was time for me to get my first. Maybe she was right back then, but later on it was a whole different story. Neither has she been able to understand my iritation of clothes that doesn’t fit me, until now when she starts to enter the same field. And suddenly I am the one to offer advice about bras...

Apart from the difficulties when it comes to shopping, I absolutely love my body. I only hope my mother at some point will be able to do the same about her’s.